Day 84

Welcome Negativity

i remember i would believe all of the negative self-talk that my mind would feed me. “i’m not good enough, there’s no way they actually like you, you’ll never amount to anything,” would constantly be running through my head. the thing is that i believed those words so much, that i became them. i was the embodiment of the negativity that was given to me by the world, the standards that i had to meet, in order to feel like i had any worth. when i became aware that i didn’t have to listen to these things and how untrue they were, i started to work on silencing them. i would pretend that voice didn’t exist and try to push it to the side. what i learned is that it isn’t a very healthy way to deal with that voice. i would push it so hard to the corner that it could comeback at me 100x stronger. i would bottle it all up and then i would be feeling it so much, it would overpower me and i would be a mess. i have practiced enough with that voice nowadays to just welcome negativity. i accept the voice and what it has to say, but i don’t linger. i listen and feel the words, for a moment, then i breathe and remember where i am with my life. i know that i am surrounded by extremely positive things that i know for a fact, i am worthy. the people that i love and the love from myself allows me to believe i am enough.

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